When the Work You Love Takes Over

Mark

Two weeks ago, we took Eden to see Hamilton, her favorite musical. Somewhere in the second act, as one song kept circling back to the idea of writing as if time were running out, I felt something tighten in my chest. Not because the music was moving (it was), but because I recognized myself in it.

I came here to make a positive impact and elevate human consciousness. That's something I genuinely believe, and it's a big part of why I do the work I do.

But sometimes, when you're passionate about making a difference, it's easy to feel like you should always be doing more.

There's another person you could help. Another conversation you could have. Another event where you could make a connection. Another opportunity to share something that might change someone's life.

And when you love what you do, it can be surprisingly difficult to know when to stop.

This past week was a perfect example. I had several speaking engagements, an all-day networking event about ninety minutes from home, our monthly mastermind session, one of our MetaMind sessions, and private calls with clients preparing for our fall retreat.

Every one of those commitments mattered to me. I wasn't doing things I resented or didn't want to do.

But by the end of the week, I could feel the difference between being excited about my work and being exhausted by the pace of it.

That's something I've been paying more attention to lately.

Because loving your work doesn't mean you have an unlimited amount of energy to give it.

Renee

And here's where Mark and I sometimes see things differently.

Mark loves being out there, speaking, meeting people, and having conversations. He gets excited about the possibilities that come from connecting with someone new.

I love those things for him. My zone of genius is behind the scenes, keeping track of the details and making sure it all gets done. That’s where I thrive.

And when we're preparing for a retreat, there's a LOT happening behind the scenes.

So when Eden mentioned that she wanted to see the Smashing Pumpkins while they were still touring, and we discovered they were playing in Jacksonville the weekend before our retreat, I had a decision to make.

Did I have time to drive two hours each way for a concert?

Not really.

Did I want to go?

Absolutely.

Mark and I saw the Smashing Pumpkins eighteen years ago at the Hard Rock inside Universal Studios in Orlando. I loved the idea of seeing them again, this time with our sixteen-year-old daughter.

So we bought the tickets.

And yes, there were plenty of things I could have been doing instead. Emails to send, details to finalize, and approximately six impossible things to do before breakfast. Though I’m pretty sure Lewis Carroll meant believing in them, not putting them on a to-do list.

But we went anyway.

And I'm really glad we did.

Mark

That concert was a good reminder of something I sometimes forget when I'm focused on serving others.

The people closest to me deserve my attention too.

It's easy to justify a full calendar when everything on it is worthwhile. I can look at every speaking opportunity, client conversation, and event and explain why it matters.

And most of the time, I'd be right.

But that doesn't mean I need to say yes to everything.

There's a difference between being committed to your work and feeling like you have to be available for it all the time.

I'm learning that taking time away doesn't diminish my commitment to making a difference. It allows me to come back to that work with more energy and enthusiasm.

And sometimes, the best thing I can do is put the work aside and enjoy an evening with my family.

Renee

I think this is something a lot of entrepreneurs struggle with, especially when they really enjoy what they do.

There's no clear line between work and life when you own a business together.

We talk about our clients over dinner. We come up with ideas while we're driving. We might be watching television when one of us suddenly remembers something that needs to happen for an event.

And I don't mind that most of the time. This is the life we've chosen, and there are a lot of things I love about it.

But I also don't want every experience to become another opportunity to work.

Sometimes a concert should just be a concert.

We can drive to Jacksonville, sing along to songs we loved twenty years ago, laugh about how much older we are now, and enjoy being with Eden without needing to turn the experience into something productive.

Although, apparently, we did turn it into a blog. 

The point is, we don't have to earn those experiences by finishing everything on our lists first.

Because if that's the requirement, I'm pretty sure we're never going to another concert.

Mark

As we head into our MetaMind retreat, I've been thinking about what I want to bring into the room.

Of course, I want to share ideas, facilitate meaningful conversations, and help our members move forward in their businesses and lives.

But I also want to arrive with the energy to truly enjoy being there.

Our retreats are some of my favorite experiences of the year. We get to spend several days with people we care about, have conversations that don't fit into a typical Zoom call, and watch relationships deepen.

I don't want to be so consumed with everything it takes to make those experiences happen that I miss enjoying them myself.

And that's a lesson I'm still learning.

Renee

I think there's a difference between working hard for something you love and forgetting to enjoy the life that work is supposed to support.

We're not planning to slow our business down or stop doing the things we're passionate about. We have a retreat to host, an event in February we're incredibly excited about, and plenty of plans for what comes next.

But we're also parents to two teenagers, and there are experiences we want to share with them while they're still living at home.

There are concerts to attend, places to visit, and ordinary evenings together that have nothing to do with our business.

I don't want to look back and realize we were so busy creating experiences for everyone else that we forgot to make room for our own.

Mark & Renee

We love the work we do, and we love the people we get to do it with.

But building a business together was never supposed to mean that every available hour belonged to the business.

Sometimes we need to step away, not because the work doesn't matter, but because the rest of our lives matters too.

And if that means driving four hours round-trip to see the Smashing Pumpkins with our daughter the weekend before a retreat, we're okay with that.

And we would happily do it again.